Ana's Bookstore

Ana's Bookstore
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4/10/2015

The Mysterious Murder of Marilyn Monroe

My most recent book that I just published on Amazon (now available on print at lulu and soon in Barnes & Noble and other major retailers) The Mysterious Murder of Marilyn Monroe has a very sensitive topic for it touches us even today, about the theory of conspiracies that remains until nowadays. I also talk about the assassination of JFK and many more issues that we inherited with the cold war. So I was afraid to let it out all open. At that time I had completely stopped writing and that had nothing to do with writer's block. I was simply denying the fact that I was too afraid of letting the matters being out in the light. My father then asked me why I stopped writing, and I gave him many excuses... but he knows me too well, then he said, " You are afraid of what people may think of it.' That answer touched me too deep. But I was still in denial. I couldn't figure out exactly why I had stopped with the book. So I started to write other books with much more "light" subjects, which was pretty fine since some sold right after I published them. It was after all these years that I felt comfortable to give the finishing strokes to that book and there it is, ready and in many people's lives now. I'm so glad I finally gave up and listened to my father's wise words. He knew it more than I did. I was afraid of what people might think of the things I wrote in that book. But now I'm ok with it, for now I know if I didn't put this book out there no one would ever do, and people wouldn't know about the things I say there. I never used a pseudonym, never felt like it, only made a pun such as "Ana Bowlova", for sometimes I feel like I love to bow (bow lover) to make reverence to life and also bowl over things... go figure. This book Iḿ talking about had many spins and turns until I felt ok to go push forward to let it breath and see the light, "The Mysterious Murder of Marilyn Monroe" that I have written in the end of 2011, it was a project that I was developing with another Mystery/Suspense writer in a writing workshop and we had to talk about the things that happened fifty years before the next year and that it would be the year 1962. So in my research I found out about so many things that happened then, and it was a revolution going on in my head. Many things that were not revealed or were never really being very investigated, that was all too fishy. So I divided the topics and decided to share ideas to write the book. But for some odd reason (that I can only conceive it now as a type of fear) a sensation of letting people read my own thoughts that froze me for about three years. I wrote many other books in the meantime, there was not actually a gap there, so I cannot even call this a writer´s block (I actually have no idea what it means, for me ideas pop up in my head all the time) so that was not even the problem of finishing the book. The thing was much deeper. It was that feeling of being rejected that I told you above, I was simply afraid of what people would think of my words, my work, the things that I was revealing there. But hey, it was just in the end of 2014 when I decided to give it the last strokes and finish it and voila:
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